Why choose a couples specialist over an individual therapist?

A therapist who specializes in couples has focused training on how couples connect, communicate, and clash. Unlike a general therapist who sometimes works with couples, a specialist is better equipped to spot hidden relationship patterns, use proven techniques to improve your bond, and help you understand how your past experiences affect your relationship today.

What percentage of couples stay together after couples therapy?

The American Association of Marriage and Family Therapists states 90% of couples who complete therapy with a highly trained couples therapist report an increase in their emotional well-being. Approximately two-thirds of participants also report improvements in their general physical well-being. Couples therapy has also shown to be as effective as individual therapy in addressing symptoms of depression in some cases.

How long will we have to attend couples therapy sessions?

At Kodo, couples work in four-month cycles. This structure provides enough time to build momentum, practice new tools, and see measurable change in your relationship. Most couples begin to notice meaningful shifts within the first few sessions, but lasting transformation typically unfolds over the course of a full cycle. At the end of each four-month period, we review your progress together and decide whether to transition out of therapy, extend for another cycle, or shift focus based on your evolving goals.

What if my partner doesn't want to come to couples therapy?

One partner being hesitant is common. Kodo offers Couples Therapy for One for individuals who want to work on their relationship even when their partner is not ready. Discernment Counseling is also available for couples where one partner is unsure about staying.

Do you offer therapy for non-traditional relationships?

Yes. Kodo welcomes couples of all backgrounds, identities, and relationship structures. Who you love is never a question; how you love is what we focus on together.

Do you take insurance for couples therapy?

Kodo does not currently accept insurance due to the limitations it places on the therapy process. Insurance companies often impose restrictions on the types of treatment and the number of sessions covered, which can limit the flexibility needed for effective therapy. Detailed superbills are provided that you can submit to your insurance company for out-of-network reimbursement.

Do you offer remote couples therapy sessions?

Yes. Kodo offers secure and confidential remote therapy sessions for couples and individuals throughout California.

What is the cost of couples counseling in Marin County?

Sessions at Kodo are $225 to $250 for 50 minutes or $330 for 80 minutes depending on clinician. Monthly superbills are available for Marin County clients who wish to use PPO out-of-network benefits.

Do you offer in-person couples intensives in Marin County?

Yes. We offer in-person couples intensives for partners in Mill Valley, San Rafael, and throughout Marin County who want to work more deeply and efficiently than traditional weekly therapy allows.

What is the difference between marriage counseling and Relational Life Therapy (RLT)?

Relational Life Therapy (RLT) is a therapeutic approach that focuses on identifying and changing relational patterns such as power struggles, emotional withdrawal, and reactivity in order to improve connection and accountability.

How long does couples therapy take?

At Kodo, couples work in four-month cycles. Most couples notice meaningful shifts within the first few sessions. At the end of each cycle we review progress together and decide whether to continue, shift focus, or transition out.

What makes Kodo different from other couples therapists in Marin?

Kodo is a couples-only practice. Every clinician specializes exclusively in relationship work, using Relational Life Therapy, EMDR, and Emotionally Focused Therapy. We do not do general therapy with occasional couples sessions — relationships are all we do.

Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy Marin County

IN NOVATO & ONLINE THROUGHOUT CALIFORNIA

Find your way back to each other

You reach for your partner and somehow it turns into another argument, or you stop reaching because it hurts too much when nothing changes.
At Kodo, we help you slow those moments down to find a different way to meet each other.

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In person in Marin County and online across California

What is Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy?

Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFT) is an attachment-based approach that helps partners understand recurring conflict, express the feelings and needs underneath it, and build a more secure emotional connection.

That can sound abstract until you recognize it in your own relationship. You ask a question, and your partner hears criticism and gets defensive. You feel dismissed and push harder and they shut down. By the end, you both feel alone.

In EFT, we pay attention to that sequence and what happens inside each of you. What felt threatening? What were you hoping your partner would understand? Where did you lose each other?

At Kodo Couples Therapy, we incorporate EFT into our broader approach to relationship work. Sessions are available at our Novato office and online for couples throughout California.

Read about EFT at ICEEFT ↗

Understanding EFT

Do you recognize yourselves here?

When connection feels out of reach

One reaches and the other pulls away.

The more one of you tries to talk, the more the other retreats. Both of you feel misunderstood, and neither knows how to stop it.

01

You keep having the same argument

The subject changes. The hurt underneath feels familiar: “Do I matter to you?” “Can I ever get this right?”

02

Life works but closeness has faded.

You manage the house, the calendar, the logistics of a shared life. But sharing something tender or reaching for each other feels harder than it used to.

03

In an Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) session, your therapist helps you and your partner notice the pattern you get caught in as it happens, slow it down, and reach the feelings and needs underneath it.

We make room for what is hard to say and help your partner hear it. You might start with “You never listen.” With support, you may find the more vulnerable feeling underneath: “When I can’t reach you, I start to feel like I don’t matter.”

Then we work with the response. Can your partner stay present without rushing to defend? Can you take in their care when it comes? These moments of reaching and responding build a more secure bond.

We move at your pace. You don’t need to arrive able to name every feeling. We help you find the words.

At Kodo, couples therapy incorporating EFT is available in person in Novato and online across California.

Inside the therapy room

Emotional connection
Accountability & Room for your history.

The Kodo approach

EFT

Understanding the bond

We explore the hurt, fear, and longing underneath your reactions and help you respond to each other with greater openness.

RLT

Taking responsibility

We name the behaviors that hurt the relationship and help you practice accountability, boundaries, and repair.

Explore Relational Life Therapy →

EMDR

Working with past experiences

When trauma is contributing to present distress, we may consider EMDR with an appropriately trained clinician after assessing fit and readiness.

Explore EMDR & trauma work →

Understanding a reaction also means looking honestly at its impact. We make space for both partners' experience while staying direct about what needs to change.